I write this much inspired. I write this, as an expression of what evades me. The song has dug its roots in me- as a sign of my times.
The opening lines speaks a boy's heart -
"Main udna chahta hoon Naina,
Daudna chahta hoon...
Girna bhi chahta hoon..
Bas rokna nahi chahta ..."
The tone is moving as it speaks volumes through the simple words. It reflects the suppressed wish to taste freedom and yet the implicit trust to come back home.
It symbolizes the prologue of a man - lost in his desire to be a boy again and turn his back on what love may hold.
Time of essence, is of inconsequence. The timeless hails supreme of what the heart speaks and the mind conjures.
The shadow of the ticking clock - stands null and void to dreams or wants.
It calls for a greater understanding of one's own restlessness and of another's patience.
Suffering is noble for its the stepping stone to things greater- or so the fable goes. Suffering is optional. A test of will and character. Few win the fight - and the few who do, know none of the borders that reality pervades one's own soul with.
As the song starts and the mellifluous Rekha Bharadwaj's vox sings out - the sigh heard , is almost palpable. You feel the deep sorrow of the female protagonist - as she tosses and trusses about in her inner turmoil - of the intrinsics of holding on or letting go.
Dreams are fragile. Once broken - they never synthesize to a new coherent cohesion. Once dead - they are ashen - sublime of their silken essence.
Once smoke - they're brittle and hurt steps as they try to divert.
The maturity of the girl, longs to lapse back into her puerility and be rebellious to fate being pre-decided and snatched away.
She sees the man she loves walk away.
True love always comes back - all fairy tales end with this happy ending.
The used always comes back in its distorted form.
But reality is crude as her own hopes bite the dust. She must bite the bullet and let go - set free her own self.
The song calls for a higher understanding of a woman over a man's mind. It calls for an esteem-hit yet a courage much untraced.
To let go and remain buried in hopes - with wings clipped is not what every girl aspires to do.
To cut the umbilical chord that unites the twin beats - is not what the heart would ever wish for.
The song is not about love or loss. Yet its lovelorn tune tears the very fiber of being - and stitches into the very core as its encore.
The song is not a plea- just a state of silent wonderment at the other's unique brand of insanity.
And the tears fall. But in the fall, lies a queer liberation as the heart gets steadily incinerated.
She seeks a lifetime - not a light installation of it. She is prepared to lose for that. For she cannot settle for the second best or play the second fiddle to one's dream or responsibility side-tracked as commitment.
The song calls for a salute !!