Tuesday, July 17, 2018

The Rewarding Self

I had read somewhere of an interesting theory that struck a chord with me. In fact even aligned with a discussion I had a peer soon after. Our observations were in the line of how humans were constantly becoming dumber. It is true, when you think about it.
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One of my personal hypothesis is that the Phone definitely makes you dumber. So, you might be using a smart phone but with its you are getting dumber. One coerced pathway your phone is making you dumber is by rooting you to the present moment - the Now.

Living the Now by your Phone is a double edged sword :

1) The most obvious is the positive side of it : living in the moment. With YOLO being a narrative of life today and the multiple videos of quitting jobs and traveling the world floating about - we make ourselves believe that planning for tomorrow or future proofing a life strategy is an old man's game. The young live now. And life should be made as experential and memorable as it can be. Hence the greater push for an "EMI" lifestyle.


2) You're constantly fame hungry. The photos you upload on Insta / FB / SC, the videos you shoot to tell your tale or the comments you make / statuses you write : you are hungry and searching for acknowledgements. You wonder if you are a recall factor - what others think about you NOW, how you appear NOW, are you cool / hot NOW - the NOW factor is a constant fight - a friction point that robs you of an action point with a positive outcome of living in the moment or simply feeling the life in a moment.

Being forced to live in the now makes you less imaginative, less creative, less focused and less proactive. In fact you may become less reactive to situations around you. Maybe less empathetic to others and play multiple roles which earlier you could, because you no longer are capable of finding that moment for yourself - that space of time to think for self and for others. To feel and to be at one with the events pertaining to that moment. Instead, you're glued to the screen - looking out for a sign of life in the digital albeit faceless world, where you en-cash all your needs of connect, affiliation and esteem.

The less time we spend to think, the lesser are the times, do we feel intelligent. We mayhaps become thick skinned too, along the way.


It makes sense when you now link it to the theory I started telling you about - its called "The Experiencing Self vs Remembering Self vs Rewarding Self" by Linda Graham, who had taken it from Kahneman's theory earlier (Thinking Fast Thinking Slow)

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 The 3 sides of self - 

Experiencing self - mainly in leisure space. For instance, watching movies / playing on PS4 or chatting on phone. In many ways this space of self is termed as "spare time" - rather it is a time marked with minimal  thought level or the capacity of reasoning and even degree of enjoyment is passive, The self is mainly in an absorbing mode - more like a sponge.

Remembering self - living in memories or rationalizing current circumstances / events via positive or negative memory structures. This earmarks higher cognitive activity linked strongly to emotions and their roots in behavior science. The self functions mainly as a machine - a data processor, a memory shredder / sifter and an experience filer.

Rewarding self - being proactive and involved in any productive pursuit. For instance writing, making a film, running or gyming. The cognitive function is at its peak with a "feel good" hormone about self coursing through blood streams. Its called Rewarding self mainly because of the degree of respect that shoots up for self, where the self is able to achieve goals set. Could I call this space of a Refracted self too - where the self is the maker, believer, doer and the re-inforcer all at once?


Going back to the earlier discussion I had started out with, why we feel dumber is that we mainly use our "Experiencing Self" over the other 2 and therefore have no concrete results to show for the span of time passed. For instance writing this article in 10 minutes vs watching a show or a video for 10 mins - entertainment has no currency, no denomination and no value to attribute to boost / loss of intelligence. Instead this write up done in 10 mins serves to push my "Rewarding self" to its altitude led attitude, and also ladder to a self appreciation. Which, by the way, is mainly a lost emotion now, as we keep seeking acceptance from others. The so many faceless others.

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In sum, the purpose of this write up is to draw attention to be aware of "which" self you are playing at the moment - question its relevance and impact on you and decide your own narrative. Being dumber or smarter is a controlled action point - it depends on definition of one's compassion, empathy, self respect and lastly self acceptance.



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